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Winner Of Lifetime Supply Of Scope Gargles Fool Head Off »

Posted by: ind06 2 years, 7 months ago

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THE ONION RADIO NEWS with Doyle Redland reporting: Dean Metsker, who recently won the grand prize in the 'Scope Mouthwash For Life Sweepstakes' can't stop swishing the minty liquid around in his mouth.

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ind06

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Comments: 32

Avg rating: (+11/-0 11)
ind06
March 28, 2007, 3:31 a.m.
Metsker has publicly challenged Don Simmondson, the winner of the 'Listerine King For Life Contest' to a public gargle-off.
Avg rating: (+0/-0 0)
kriicket
March 28, 2007, 7:50 a.m.
"Upscale Gargle Bar" lol, too funny !! I have to ask this question though....Is that man the REAL Mintyfunk ???
Avg rating: (+3/-0 3)
2sidestoeverything
March 28, 2007, 8:48 a.m.
LOL!
Avg rating: (+7/-1 6)
Eagle_Eye
March 28, 2007, 9:03 a.m.
LOL to!
Avg rating: (+6/-0 6)
BronxBomber
March 28, 2007, 9:05 a.m.
Well, at least he'll won't die of halitosis...
;-)
Avg rating: (+8/-2 6)
1basque1
March 28, 2007, 9:17 a.m.
A whole new level to clean, fresh breath...Kiss me baby !!
Avg rating: (+0/-0 0)
Commodore1
March 28, 2007, 1:15 p.m.
Who put this story up? Someone is really desperate for entertainment. WHO CARES?????????
Avg rating: (+16/-0 16)
Beeboppin71
March 28, 2007, 1:37 p.m.
Ahhhh Man! I sooooo wanted to win that contest. I have an in-law who could really use it. Damn Dean Metsker to hell!!!! I guess I'll have to visit his Scope shelter for the homeless and get my relative some there.
Avg rating: (+0/-0 0)
Mindflux
March 28, 2007, 1:58 p.m.
I'm waiting for the guy to get seriously ill from gargling Scope. Then we'll have some huge article on mouth rinses and how they are toxic for you.
MUAHAHAH
Avg rating: (+10/-0 10)
Beeboppin71
March 28, 2007, 2:02 p.m.
Great point Mindflux. Maybe they're giving him a life time supply because they don't expect him to live that long. Whhhew! Thank God I didn't win that contest. Better to smell the in-law's breath than to kill them.
Avg rating: (+3/-0 3)
elel
March 28, 2007, 3:37 p.m.
ooh just wait, and upscale gargle bar with free internet and Onion Radio!
Avg rating: (+0/-0 0)
truthiness
March 28, 2007, 7:38 p.m.
can the homeless go to the upscale bar for their mouthwash or will it be discriminating?
Avg rating: (+7/-0 7)
johnkamis64
March 29, 2007, 9:57 p.m.
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares,why is there a stupid song about it???