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How to fight a bear »

Posted by: pagey 1 year, 11 months ago

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There are a few things a man should know: how to chop wood; how to crack open a beer, how to swig and belch; how to get out of a bar brawl; how to act inappropriately on a first date; and, more importantly, how to fight a bear. Yes, that's right, a bear.

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pagey

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Comments: 13

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matters5
Jan. 13, 2008, 11:43 a.m.
Ah yes, perfect channel for this article: "Do-it-yourself"
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Teech
Jan. 13, 2008, 8:21 p.m.
"Grandpa, what do I do if I meet a bear in the woods?"
"No problem son. Just reach down, grab a big handful of sh!t and throw it right in his face."
"Grandpa, what if I can't find a handful of sh!t?"
"Don't worry son. It'll be there."
....If one has to fight a bear, one has already lost.
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BronxBomber
Jan. 13, 2008, 9:18 p.m.
Be "smarter than the average bear"
Throw a picnic basket...
;o)
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kboy
Jan. 13, 2008, 9:56 p.m.
Always remember. You do not need to be faster than the bear, only faster than someone in your group.
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Gransater
Jan. 14, 2008, 1:44 a.m.
And, if all else fails and you're mano a mano so to speak, bite the left ear really hard, so he knows who's the boss.
G ;)
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blinkers
Jan. 14, 2008, 1:50 a.m.
Unbearable humor!
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Raiderwall
Jan. 14, 2008, 2:33 a.m.
This is a useful article. It may come in handy, you never know. Civilization is expanding into the Bears natural habitats, and should you move into one of these areas you may find yourself in a spot where knowing how to deal with a charging Bear will be useful. If you live up north there are polar bears, who are losing their territory and may come after yours. in China there are panda bears, which people tend to underestimate. In other parts of the world there are brown and black bears. I live in Chicago. We have Bears in Chicago. I will clip and save this article.
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blinkers
Jan. 14, 2008, 3:44 a.m.
Ha!
Then there was the bear with no hair. They named him "Fred". (Hi, Cactus Annie)
palamaComment has been removed: Retracted by user
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greenmac
Jan. 14, 2008, 12:19 p.m.
I have spent a lot of time in the woods and only had one eye to eye with a bear ....three feet away looking down on me. I retreated .... she took what she wanted and moved on.