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Posted by: uncle-dave 1 year, 6 months ago
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uncle-dave1 year, 6 months ago
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ind061 year, 6 months ago
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As a representative of The American Blueberry Farmer PAC I can only say that I am SHOCKED and DEEPLY SADDENED by your dismissal of the fine work of America's blueberry farmers! Blueberry farmers are real Americans and clearly you are living in an ivory tower and completely out of touch or you would know that!
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uncle-dave1 year, 6 months ago
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SIR!!! I will have you know that ABFP is clearly the LARGEST conglomerate of effete elitist's that the berry world has ever seen! While YOU SIR may have found your thrill on Bluberry Hill I, a representative of the HUCKLEBERRY PICKERS PAC, have long endured the ridicule and razzing by the Bourgeois Blueberry Plutocracy!!! The Huckleberry is the fruit of the working class SIR!! Not like your Blue Blooded Blueberry Bloviaters!!! It is YOU sir that seems to be out of touch with the REAL Americans!!! It is YOU sir that Rants from YOUR ivory tower proclaiming that Vaccinium corymbosum is the best berry, when we all know that the huckleberry is the fruit of the masses!
Sincerely yours,
H.Beauregard Boondoggle Da Turd
From da office in da Bronx
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ind061 year, 6 months ago
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Hmph! More balderdash and boonswaggling from the Huckleberry contingent, when everyone KNOWS that the Huckleberry isn't even REALLY a berry! Science has proven the Huckle"berry" to be a genetically deformed nut! I like to call them "HUCKSTER"berries myself! Take your pretenders to the berry throne and farm them elsewhere, no TRUE American sits down at Thanksgiving for Hucksterberry pie!
Hmph! And Hmph again!
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uncle-dave1 year, 6 months ago
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Sir!!! You leave me NO alternative but to throw down the fruit filled gauntlet and challenge you to a gentleman's duel.....lets say whipped cream pies at twenty paces?!
Mr. Rinty will act as my double SIR! I am anxiously awaiting your reply!!!!!
Hmph to you sirrr!!! And Hmph again!!! Drat!!!
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Beau78901 year, 6 months ago
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That's a shame, Uncle Dave.
Bananas and pecans are in high standing where I am.
As a member of both the Conglomerated Crop Corporations' Credit Committee and the Produce Pickers Promotion Program, we have reciprocal agreements with both the Belize Banana Business Bureau and the Pecan Producers' Pancake Project.
And we've done work for the Mississippi Stippled Pickle Pickers' Pickled Pepper PAC, or as we like to call it, the MSPPPPPAC.
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Beau78901 year, 6 months ago
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We're pushing for reciprocation with the Peruvian Pickled Prickly Pear PAC.
Unfortunately, The State of Mississippi has provocatively punished the Mississippi Stippled Pickle Pickers, predicting purposeful pullbacks of its periodic stipends to the Pickled Pepper PAC for perverting purity procedures during the penultimate pickling period by not packing stippled pickles properly in a perpendicular fashion.
The MSPPPPPAC publishes a prospectus as a PDF on its web page providing proof positive of its impeccable purity procedures. the PDF stipulates provisions for particularly peculiar disparities in accepted packing permutations. They predict perusal of the purity procedures will reveal that the State of Mississippi is nitpicking, prejudicially penalizing the PAC.
The Mississippi Stippled Pickle Pickers' Pickled Pepper PAC also presents its persnickity pecuniary principles as a PowerPoint presentation on the same web page as its purity procedures, for your inspection.
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uncle-dave1 year, 6 months ago
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"False berries like BLUEBERRY and cranberry, are epigynous, made from a part of the plant other than a single ovary."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Berries
Ha!!! Ha!!! Haaaaaa!!!!!
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ind061 year, 6 months ago
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Of course you refer to Wikipedia, which everyone KNOWS has a pronounced Huckleberry BIAS. That article isn't even science, just more of the pseudo-science the Huckleberry contingent likes to flaunt in order to further their goal of COMPLETE BERRY SUPREMACY! Well, sir, you may be bought and paid for by the Huckleberry PAC but the rest of us are free to breathe AMERICAN air and speak the TRUTH without resorting to SPIN!
Yes, true BLUE American air!
I pick up your gauntlet and accept your challenge!
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uncle-dave1 year, 6 months ago
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Gird up thy loins, and stand up......Take the girdle that is upon thy loins, and arise, and go to the ........EWWWWWW!!!!!! WHAT have you been eating?! Gasp...cough cough ...sniffle sniffle......
... I guess that's another good reason NOT to eat Bluberries....EWWWWWW!!!!!! You can keep the glove....ARGHHH!
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