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Posted By jsmolinski08 11 months, 2 weeks ago in Humor

A few months back, as the modern financial system was revealing itself to be a hyper-stimulated and under-funded wreck, some unfamiliar merchandise turned up in midtown, along with a pitch: “ This might be just the thing for jittery Wall Street right now.” The merchandise was liquid— a six-pack of tall purple cans with the word “ DRANK” printed beneath a drawing of what looked like a bottle of Robitussin, along with the slogan “ Slow Your Roll.” To a hip-hop fan, if not to a banker, the allusion is obvious: purple drank is a kind of instant moonshine, originating in the Houston rap scene, and consisting primarily of cough syrup and 7UP. (Variations abound, some featuring Jolly Ranchers.) It’ s a sedative, and therefore well suited to the slow, vaguely psychedelic Southern rap favored by artists like Lil Wayne, whose song “ Me and My Drank” includes the lyrics “ I’ m a sip until I lean hard / Drink got me moving slower than a retard. . . . One more ounce will make me feel so great / Wait, now I can’ t feel my face.”

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