Uncle Jay Explains The News, May 4th, 2009 »

Posted By ind06 9 months, 1 week ago in Humor

Prop it 95 1 drop Drop it

DO NOT DO THIS! And for more about how to protect yourself against whatever they've named the flu this week, do not watch TV or go on the internet. After all, Uncle Jay explains everything!

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ind06

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ind069 months, 1 week ago

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Today's Homeland Security safety rule: No kissing pigs, politicians or other swine!

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  quicksilver06029 months, 1 week ago
  
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  With all due respect to Homeland Security, I think the kid's onto something - licking a pig's snout is an effective, affordable, and may I say, proactive approach to inoculating oneself against the ravages of swine flu...
  
  As for politicians, be sure to practice *safe snout*...I'd explain further but I'm shy.
  
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  Beau78909 months, 1 week ago
  
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  Jeez...I was gonna give you a break, but given that comment..."Doesn't Like Pigs"?
  
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    quicksilver06029 months, 1 week ago
    
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    Fortunately, Homeland Security, WHO and the CDC are working feverishly on a Beau Virus vaccine. Coincidentally, the delivery system is administered through eye drops.
    
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  uncle-dave9 months, 1 week ago
  
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  This accusation of “pig kissing” is a common misconception. That child is what is known in the farming community as a swine snout taster. He merely tastes the pig’s snout to see if it’s “done” yet and ready for slaughter. As a matter of fact that is a picture of me when I was a child……and before you ask, indy….I’M THE ONE ON THE RIGHT!!! ;D
  
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    quicksilver06029 months, 1 week ago
    
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    At least you didn't make a reference to your mother this time ;P
    
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    ind069 months, 1 week ago
    
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    And a dandy picture of you doing a farmer's work, Uncle Dave!
    
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mpchekuri9 months, 1 week ago

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Probably what he is saying is right.

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  ind069 months, 1 week ago
  
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  You mean, if you're a pig, don't let a baby lick your nose?
  
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    quicksilver06029 months, 1 week ago
    
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    With all due respect to the pig, I think...
    
    ;)
    
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chevydog9 months, 1 week ago

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I almost went into hysteria after getting accosted by a flying pig. Went into the cafe to get a Pontiac Grand Slam breaksfast. Was told by the waitress to stay calm until the kitchen reorganized. Some days, nothing goes right.

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  Charlson9 months, 1 week ago
  
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  Was it really a flying pig or did the cook just throw a pork chop at you? lol.
  
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    Ciera-Marie9 months, 1 week ago
    
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    Really a flying pig Germany's released them 'cuz you know they're into all that weird science fiction horror crap.
    
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Progressive9 months, 1 week ago

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As long as pigs don't fly over lower Manhattan at low altitude, I'm not going to worry too much about swine flu.

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  uncle-dave9 months, 1 week ago
  
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  Would you worry about swine flu over the cuckoo?
  
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    Progressive9 months, 1 week ago
    
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    Hey, you're either on the pig or off the pig...
    
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  quicksilver06029 months, 1 week ago
  
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  Formy! You're here - our incantation worked!
  
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Spadecaller9 months, 1 week ago

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I blame the police.

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  ind069 months, 1 week ago
  
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  Is that the "serve"part?
  
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  Ciera-Marie9 months, 1 week ago
  
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  OMG! Best comment so far!
  
  Never, ever in a million years did I ever think someone would form a sentence with "little blue pill, hockey and beer."
  
  This actually sounds like good advice to my neighbors to the right in WI minus Shadowolf (someone say hi to him. I miss his puns.), could use. You know "no mixing little blue pill, beer, brats, cheese, cold weather, cheese head hat and football."
  
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Charlson9 months, 1 week ago

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Just don't swap spit and you'll be fine!

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  ind069 months, 1 week ago
  
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  Even that's OK, if the spit is sealed in a jar and properly labeled!
  
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    Charlson9 months, 1 week ago
    
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    I should have been more specific. lmao.
    
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Progressive9 months, 1 week ago

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Whoa...here they come!:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmCKvY684WI

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